The Last First Day

So many of you know that I have been going to school which seems like the better part of my life. I could only afford to go part time, so that is what I did...for 8 years. For 8 years, I have been a student, I have sat in classrooms and watched the people around me get younger and younger while I worried about how I was going to be able to feed my animals or pay that bill that was looming above my head. But I persevered, with a determination that fueled me for 8 years. I have watched people move on, and my friends start their lives and although my life has never been empty, it has always revolved around school. So here it is, one of the days that I have been waiting for since I was 22. The light at the end of the tunnel is almost blinding now and my heart beats with such excitement and terror that I'm not sure which one to feel first. But I do know that I feel happy and for some reason Ive not been able to stop smiling.

And so it begins

So it seems that every year, I make resolutions and lets face it...shit is really hard to stick to when you are just trying to make it through life with your head above water. This year I wanted to do something a little different. I didnt want to list how I wanted to be a better person. I didnt want to put it out there for the whole world to read (or at least the 2 people who might read this) I really just wanted to take things one day at a time. Life is hard. My routine is very stubborn and very unforgiving when it comes to introducing new things. In fact there are times when my routine straight up shuts my ideas down immediately. So this year, Im just going to try. I know I have a huge year ahead of me with many obstacles to over come and goals to shoot for, so instead of listing them, Im just going to try for each of them. And even if I dont make all my resolutions come true, I will know that I tried, one day at a time. Every journey begins with one step...so here is my step.

Life on the Farm Take 1

So most of you know, I live on a little piece of land in Lakehills Texas. Podunk USA. I LOVE it here. Its far enough to get away from the city, but just close enough that I can go and see my dad and sister when I feel like it. I actually wouldn't mind moving a little further out, but really, one dream at a time is all I seem to be managing these days. So Jenny and I live on about 5 acres, give or take, of land. We rent, but our landlords are so cool about everything, there are days when I feel like this piece of land is our own. So I call it our little farm on Wrong Way Lane. Which really couldn't be a more perfect name...because we are wrong in a lot of ways. We have more animals than we know what to do with but we love them all. We are about to acquire a goat...lets see how that adventure unfolds. Axle needs a friend and really a goat is the cheapest option. Life out in the country is supposed to be easy, and slow and relaxing...but I don't think I have ever had an easy, slow, relaxing day. There is always something to do. Something is either dying or being born or stuck in a fence or wounded or something that calls us to take care of whatever God decides to throw our way. And most days, Jenny and myself, attempt to do this with a grace that sometimes leaves us. There seems to be a lot death lately so to ease the pain, I see if I can hit landmarks when I throw bodies over the fence. I told my boss this and I really should have taken a picture of her face. But death isn't sad to me...it just makes way for new lives that the spring will inevitably bring.

Bliss

My life is dream, and although its never been a fairytale, I feel like there are moments when its possible that I can fly...this is that moment.

A long Time Coming

I'm not going to lie. My bestie Jenny started a blog and it reminded me that I have one too! I have not written anything in a really long time. Don't get me wrong, I have started PLENTY of things, but lets face it...I have ADD and I do half of this stuff at work so I get distracted very easily. These past few months have been an emotional and physical roller coaster and there are days when I would like to pack up my things and hit the road. There are times when I wish someone would have told me that there are days when things get better and there are days when things get worse. Responsibility isnt all its cracked up to be. But for once, in a long time, I am happy with my life. So I promise to write more, and stay in touch more and let people know what is really going on.

La Playa

This past weekend my sister, my girlfriend and I went to the beach for a little mini vacation. Here are some things I learned about the wonder filled town of Corpus Christi:

1. The church to bar ratio evens itself out
2. There are a boat load of car dealerships
3. About every 5th building seems to be abandoned
4. You will get sand everywhere
5. I'm pretty sure the locals don't appreciate seagulls
6. people will make fun of you if you fish with a bobber
7. do whatever it is you want to do while you are there...you probably wont ever see these people again anyhow.

This mini vacation was good for my soul. It was just enough time for me to rejuvenate myself and refocus.

Touching a Life

All my life Ive wanted to make sure I have had some sort of affect on people...preferably a good one. I wanted to touch people's lives. Ive wanted to make sure that maybe my words or maybe an action went noticed. Ive never really said these things out loud, but this is what I have always secretly wanted. As most of you know, I have a pretty good job at a pretty good college. One of the perks of my job is supervising students who work in our office. When I first started, I was a little intimidated by them. A lot of them were older than or the same age as me. But as time ages us all, the incoming students haven't really changed. This year I feel really blessed to have a special bunch. They have affectionately named themselves "Randi's Misfits." I never really know if I am getting through to them. I never really know if I am touching their lives in a way that is impacting them for the good. I was cleaning up a bit of my office today and I read a card that one of my kids gave me a few years back and it read:

Randi,
Seriously though, thanks for everything you have done for me over the
past year. Your support and laughter really made my days better. I
will miss you next year. Thanks for being a great boss.

I remember this student very vividly and watched her grow into an amazing woman. I never want to toot my own horn, but this made me see that I'm not hitting too far off the mark when it comes to making a difference in someones life...and that is a really comforting fact. And in turn, I realize now that they are making a difference in my life. I love my "kids", and I'm lucky to have them.